Having it "all together"

News Flash: I DON'T HAVE IT ALL TOGETHER!!! (And neither do you)

Let me preface the following story by saying this is not a complaint or a pity party (I already had one of those yesterday)...this is just me being honest about what my day looked like yesterday.

It all started when I woke up to find that school was delayed due to weather. That was no real surprise but it meant that Lane's morning nap would be cut short so I could bring Ava to school. Then the girls woke up - both on the wrong side of the bed, so I played more referee than mom for the fist few hours of the morning. Oh, and did I mention that everyone woke up about thirty minutes earlier than usual? That means no shower for mom. All kids have a cold and were extra whiny which is my least favorite thing! I got Ava to school and thought it would be a little more relaxed with only the two younger kiddos at home. Wrong! Elise was beside herself and cried for most of the two hours that Ava was gone. I was longing for nap time. We picked Ava up and headed home for a quick snack and then REST TIME! Lane and Elise went down fine but Ava thought rest time was too boring and got out of bed ten times in 30 minutes. No rest for mom. After nap time I got changed for exercise class, got the diaper bag packed, and got all coats, boots, hats, and mittens ready for everyone to head out. While doing this I'm thinking "is exercising really worth all this effort?! Seriously!!" YES it is! I needed to get out of the house and have a break from my darling cherubs. I loaded us into the truck and headed for the gym. We found a not-so-close parking spot and after turning off the truck I got kids out of seats and put coats back on - because we can't wear them in our carseats, of course. Ava was opening the door and I began barking at her about waiting for me to come open the door because she could hit the car next to us, she can't be outside alone, I wasn't ready, etc. Once I was ready for us to get out I slowly opened my door only to have a huge gust of wind fling it open and smash it into the car next to me. Ugh! Not only did I feel like a jerk because I just did what I told my daughter not to do, but now I was thinking about how much this is going to cost us. We have insurance but there's bound to be out of pocket expenses which is just what we don't need, as we're just digging out of the hole after last month - two birthdays, Christmas, replacing vehicle headlights, broken clothes washer...the list goes on. It was convenient that the driver of the car next to me was still in her car when I hit her and she was going to the same exercise class as I was - would have been nice to meet under better circumstances. We agreed to share insurance information once I got everyone inside. As the kids and I trekked through the parking lot I'm thinking about telling Eric and about insurance, Elise is crying because its cold, Ava is asking a million questions about what just happened and what insurance is, and to top it all of Lane dropped his blankey in the nasty road slush. A kind man behind us picked up the blanket and I thanked him after grumbling something about this not really being worth me leaving the house - Ever! I realized the man goes to the same church as we do, and then all I could think of was what a jerk I must have sounded and looked like to him and anyone else observing me. Did I mention that I'm the wife of a church elder? Awesome! We got inside and I told my hubby what happened and he was totally ok about it. I still felt terrible and just wanted to crawl into bed and hide - pretend it never happened. But it did happen....and I messed up a lot of times throughout the craziness of the day.

As I laid my head on my pillow last night, I couldn't help but think about how much pressure we moms put on ourselves and others to have life all together - or to at least look like we do. Here's a newsflash for us all: NOBODY HAS IT TOGETHER! Nobody! The Bible says that Jesus is the only perfect One to ever walk the earth. We can strive all we want but that will always end in failure. I am as guilty as anyone as I try to carry on this facade that life is easy, that I have no struggles, that I love being a mom every second of every day. I am publicly admitting that I really don't have anything figured out and that I absolutely do not have it all together. I don't want to pretend that I do anymore - its exhausting! Life is hard and we do struggle. Jesus is the One who gives us peace and rest in the midst of the craziness of life. He doesn't expect perfection from us but wants us to bring our messed-up selves to the foot of the Cross and ask Him to clean us up as only He can. Ladies I can look at my story from yesterday and laugh now, but I know that some days are so tough that it's challenging to find a bright spot or to see the humor in it all. I encourage you to turn to Jesus. He is our only hope. He is the only perfect One. We do not have to strive to have some sort of "perfect life". He will take you as you are. There is nothing you can do or say that will make Him turn His face from you. And He doesn't expect us to have anything together. Amen!

God's grace to you all,
Dani

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you & learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." - Matthew 11:28-29